


instead of calling me out, you should be pulling me in

by quirkily



Series: why can't we be friends when we are lovers? [2]
Category: Check Please! (Webcomic)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Bisexual Derek "Nursey" Nurse, Chowder is a good friend, Fluff, Gay William "Dex" Poindexter, Implied Sexual Content, M/M, No Smut, POV William "Dex" Poindexter, nursey and dex get their shit together, they talk about it, who is sick of their shit
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-17
Updated: 2019-08-17
Packaged: 2020-09-02 03:22:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,346
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20269195
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/quirkily/pseuds/quirkily
Summary: Something in Nursey’s voice catches, forcing Dex to look up at him again. He could kiss him right now. He could say, ‘yes, just me’ or ‘I love you’ or ‘I spent so long trying to figure you out and now that I have, I’m never letting go’, and then he could kiss him and it would be like the end of a movie.Except that it wouldn’t. Because this is Dex and Nursey. They can be friends, or they can be lovers. And the second option will always end the same.So while Dex longs to lean up and kiss Nursey for the whole world to see, and God, is he tempted, he refrains.He will always choose the option that doesn’t end with Nursey hating him.





	instead of calling me out, you should be pulling me in

**Author's Note:**

> This is a sequel/companion piece to the first work in this series, "you pick a fight and i'll define it." I tried to write them both as separate works that can be read on their own, but if you want context (and more Nurseydex content!), definitely go read that first. 
> 
> Title & inspiration taken from The 1975's 'Sincerity is Scary.'

Dex watches as Nursey’s mask falls back into place. He can pinpoint the moment it happens, the instant that all of his walls are built back up. 

No one else notices. No one else has slammed against those walls often enough to recognise when they’re there and when they’re not. 

Nursey’s smile isn’t reaching his eyes. Dex can feel his own annoyance rising.

He thinks he could make Nursey take off the mask if he wanted. Poke and prod until his walls break and come tumbling down around them. 

Chowder catches his eye and gives him a concerned look. Dex feels instantly guilty. He knows from experience the mess his fights with Nursey cause, and Chowder and the others don’t deserve to have team breakfast ruined just because Dex wants Nursey’s attention. 

Dex breaks away from Chowder’s intent gaze and looks back down at his toast. Chowder knows them both too well to have not noticed the weird tension between Dex and Nursey. He doubts Chowder has figured out what exactly has caused the tension, but he could be wrong about that. Maybe Nursey told him. Dex’s stomach twists funnily at the thought. 

Ransom startles Dex out of his thoughts with a long impressive burp that earns him a fist bump from Holster and a chastising from Bitty. 

Dex watches Ransom casually swing an arm across Nursey’s shoulders in his peripheral vision, staring at his toast intently and fighting down a feeling that feels too close to jealousy to be comfortable. He rolls his eyes at himself. The massive heart-eyes Ransom has reserved for Holster make it impossible for him to see anyone else romantically, and everyone knows it. Except for Holster. 

“So Nursey,” Ransom starts slyly, “Heard that Angela you were seeing’s got a new boo. A new apple of her eye. A rose amongst the thorns, if I may.”

“You calling me a thorn, Rans?” Nursey smirks.

Ransom lifts his arm off Nursey shoulder to pull off a nonchalant shrug before dropping it back into place, “Just wanted to check how you were doing, man. It’s not every day you let a beauty like that slip into the arms of… what was her name?”

“Denice,” Holster supplies helpfully. 

“Denice,” Ransom nods solemnly, “They seem pretty serious, too. Think you missed your chance to lock her down. Or, you know, keep ‘hanging out’.”

Dex studiously inspects a corner of his toast that he failed to cover with jam. He’s in the process of priding himself on controlling his emotions, well aware that a situation like this would have set him off a few months ago when all his self-control goes to shit.

Nursey, who has been silently nodding along to Ransom’s teasing but genuine antics, finally replies, “Oh, what a shame.”

It’s the tone, not the words, that startles Dex. The complete lack of emotion behind Nursey’s words. The  _ genuine _ lack of emotion. This isn’t part of Nursey’s facade. He’s not pretending he doesn’t care in an effort to mask his hurt, the same way he does when he hears something racist or homophobic. He genuinely doesn’t give a shit about who Angela is dating. 

Dex processes all of this in a matter of seconds and his head snaps up. Nursey’s eyes catch Dex’s across the table. 

Memories of those eyes staring up at Dex’s during long nights of shared body heat flood unwanted into Dex’s mind, and he tears his eyes away.

Dex knows his face is burning and suspects the heat has travelled all the way down his neck. Incredibly conscious of everyone’s eyes on him, he scarfs down the rest of his toast as fast as he can, standing up from the table as he shoves the last crust into his mouth. 

Dex fights down the urge to bolt from the room, not wanting to raise any further suspicion from Chowder. Instead, he starts collecting empty plates and cutlery from around the table, words of thanks echoing around him. 

Nursey stays silent. 

\---

Dex is engrossed in his comp sci assignment when his brain registers the conversation happening at the table next to him and pulls him out of his productive state. 

“Derek Nurse?” a girl asks in a voice that’s far too loud for a library, and Dex almost turns around to glare at her. He’s only got a day to finish this assignment and he isn’t in the mood to be distracted by gossip about Nurse, of all people.

Her friends seem to have better manners and shush her, and when she starts speaking again it's toned down slightly, “Isn’t that the one you’re sleeping with, Angie?”

This grabs all of Dex’s attention, and he sighs as any hope of getting this assignment finished at a reasonable hour disappears.

“Nah girl,” another voice pipes up, “Angie’s got herself a theatre girl now, remember?”

They all laugh for a bit before a new voice says, “We weren’t doing anything but smoking anyway. Boy wouldn’t put out!” 

This voice must be Angela, Dex realises.

“Taken?” one of her friends guesses and Dex feels himself tense. He’s not sure he wants to know, and he curses his brain for listening in. 

“Lovesick,” Angela replies, “Pining over some boy.”

It’s taking all of Dex’s restraint not to swivel in his chair and blatantly stare at them. 

“Doesn’t like him back?” the second girl asks sympathetically.

Dex isn’t sure whether he wants to get up, march over there, and demand they tell him everything, or quietly pack up his laptop and leave. 

The second option would be healthier. Shitty would tell him to do the second one. The on-campus psych would tell him to do the second one. 

But he can’t get his legs to move.

Angela snorts, “Who knows? I thought the hockey boys were supposed to be more emotionally intelligent, but I don’t think they’re any different from the LAX bros, in all honesty.”

The girls laugh again, and Dex frowns, trying to decipher what Angela means.

She continues, “I mean, apparently neither of them are capable of talking about their feelings.”

“Wait, so they’re teammates? That’s gotta be complicated…”

Dex’s mind is racing. He shoves his laptop into his bag and stumbles out of the library, the screech of his chair against the floor still echoing as the door swings closed behind him. 

\--- 

The air in Chowder’s room is thick as Dex shuffles in, eyes trained on the floorboards. Nursey’s already there, slumped casually on Chowder’s bed in a way that instantly puts Dex on edge. 

Chowder looks up from where he’s rummaging at his desk, searching for his laptop, “Oh, hey Dex!” 

His cheerful tone fills the room in a way Dex used to think was effortless. He now knows Chowder better and recognises it for the intentional attempt to diffuse tension that it is. 

“Hey, Chow,” Dex mumbles, dropping his bag on the floor. 

He looks at Nursey, notes the way he is carefully looking at his phone, and trains his gaze back on Chowder. 

If Nursey wants to ignore him, that’s fine by Dex. They both know the only reason they’re here is for Chowder’s sake. Neither wanted to be the asshole who cancelled Frogs Night. Neither wanted to explain to Chowder what was going on. 

Dex clears his throat, “So, what are we watching?”

Chowder pulls his laptop out from underneath a stack of papers, “Well, Nursey chose last week, and I couldn’t remember who chose the week before that, so I thought I would wait and see if you could remember, and if it’s your turn to choose then you’re the only one who can answer that! But if it’s my turn, then there was this new Netflix film I saw an ad for on…”

Dex is grateful for Chowder’s rambling, his mind too preoccupied to hold a decent conversation, “Whatever you want to watch, Chow.” 

Chowder’s face lights up, diving into an explanation so precise Dex wonders whether Chowder’s already seen it. 

Nursey still hasn’t said a word. Dex is still hovering in the doorway. 

Chowder takes the laptop over to the bed and positions himself in the middle like always. Dex hesitates a second before joining them. 

He looks over at Nursey, trying to catch his eye, but Nursey is steadfastly ignoring him. It feels like it used to, back when they first met. When Dex had thought they were too different to ever get along, and they spent every minute shouting but never listening. 

Dex hates it. 

They had started becoming friends, Dex thinks. Before they’d ruined everything. 

The movie starts playing, and Dex tears his eyes away from Nursey. He feels like he’s always tearing his eyes away from Nursey.

He catches Chowder giving him a worried look, and offers a weak smile. Chowder frowns but doesn’t say anything. 

He tries his best to pay attention to the movie. From what he can tell, it’s good, and he knows he’s just going to end up watching it again by himself later, but he just can’t concentrate. 

Dex’s mind is spinning like the wheel of fortune on that shitty late-night show his mum loves, round and round and round, and always landing on Nursey.

Nursey grinning. Nursey glaring across the room. Nursey ruffling his hair after taking off one of his stupid hats. Nursey drunk at a kegster, laughing, and dancing, and pulling on Dex’s arm, tugging him towards the dance floor. Nursey curled up on the bathroom floor at three in the morning, crying, and shaking, and staring at Dex like he’s been caught doing something wrong. Nursey’s eyes, warm and inviting. Nursey’s face, shuttered off from the world. 

Dex wishes they could go back to those memories. 

The ones before Nursey, pulling him in for a kiss. Nursey, waking up beside him, the first rays of dawn lighting up his face. Nursey, expression like he’s been slapped, hurt and anger simmering in his eyes. 

Part of Dex wishes he could go back even further. Before he realised the hot feeling in his chest around Nursey wasn’t hatred. Maybe even before he realised the way he looked at boys wasn’t always platonic. 

Back when they first met, it had been simple. Dex hated Nursey. Nursey hated Dex. Neither of them had tried to get to know each other, sticking to their first assumptions and taking insults at face value. 

Maybe that was better, in a way. 

If Dex’s relationship with Nursey was always going to return to the same messy disaster, then he wished he’d never gotten to know Nursey at all. 

Nursey hating him hurt so much less when he wasn’t in love with him. 

\--- 

The basement is cold but Will doesn’t mind. It reminds him of winters at home, cold air seeping through cracks he was constantly patching up, the half-broken heater struggling to fight off the chill. 

The basement is lonely. Will minds that more. 

After screaming at Nursey about needing his own space, here he is, missing him. The irony isn’t lost on him. 

As if on cue, Will’s phone chimes. He fights down the sour taste in his mouth when he sees it’s not from Nursey. 

It’s Dylan. 

_ I'm bored, wanna hang out ;) _

Will rolls his eyes. He doesn’t understand why people text in such cryptic ways. If you want to fuck, just say you want to fuck. 

He looks at the message again. Will decidedly does  _ not _ want to fuck. Dylan, at least. 

He was a good kisser, from what Will could remember from the kegster, when he was drunk and pumped up on adrenaline. But he’d kissed Dylan more out of convenience than actual interest. He’d been looking for a way to come out, and Will had always been better with actions than with words, so when Dylan sauntered over and started flirting… well, Will had taken the opportunity. 

If he’d hoped it would help him forget Nursey for even a brief moment, it hadn’t. 

It hadn’t helped the last time Dylan had texted him either. They’d gone out for coffee and walked around campus, and while Dylan seemed nice enough, Will had spent the entire time completely uninterested in anything he had to say. 

He looks back at his phone. Dylan clearly thought their coffee date had gone better than Will did. Or he was just really horny.

Part of him is tempted to go along with it. Have some fun, block Nursey out a while longer.

But he knows it’s useless. His heart twists at the thought of giving Nursey any more reasons to hate him. 

He types out a few different replies, struggling to find the right words to casually tell Dylan he isn’t interested. Now, or ever. 

He sighs and gives up, shoving the phone back in his pocket, text unanswered. 

Hopefully, Dylan gets the message.

\--- 

They’re all walking out of the rink after early morning practice when Nursey sidles up to Dex and falls into step with him. 

Dex waits for him to say something, or jokingly punch him in the shoulder, or ruffle his hair, or anything Nursey used to do around him. 

Instead, Nursey brings a hand up to the back of his neck in a nervous gesture, before quickly stretching and adjusting the strap of his bag. 

Dex snaps, “Stop that.”

Nursey starts and his mask drops into place, “I haven’t said anything, Poindexter.”

“Exactly,” Dex bites out.

Nursey furrows his brows and Dex sighs. 

“I can see through it, you know,” Dex starts, “Your ‘chill’. I know it’s fake, I know you’re just trying to cover up all your emotions, so you don’t feel them anymore. I can see through it, so just stop! Because guess what, Nurse?”

Dex is agitated now, his arms cutting through the air in jagged motions, and he’s so caught up in his own head that he doesn’t expect a reply, but Nursey gives him one. 

“What?” Nursey asks gently, and Dex deflates. 

He takes a couple of deep breaths before meeting Nursey’s eyes, “Emotions are what make us human, Nurse. And I like you a hell of a lot more when you feel things.”

They look at each other for a moment and Dex realises how much he’s missed Nursey the past week. He almost tells him.

Then Nursey’s face breaks out in a smile, and it’s one that meets his eyes, so Dex smiles back.

“I’ve missed you, Poindexter.”

Dex rolls his eyes but he’s still smiling, “Yeah, yeah. Come on, let’s go get breakfast at Annie's before classes start.”

Nursey laughs and swings his arm around Dex’s shoulders, and he feels himself warm at the contact. 

“Am I really that obvious?” Nursey asks in a tone that suggests he’s joking, but Dex knows better.

“No,” Dex says thoughtfully, “Not to everyone.”

“Just you?”

Something in Nursey’s voice catches, forcing Dex to look up at him again. He could kiss him right now. He could say,  _ ‘yes, just me’ _ or  _ ‘I love you’ _ or  _ ‘I spent so long trying to figure you out and now that I have, I’m never letting go’, _ and then he could kiss him and it would be like the end of a movie. 

Except that it wouldn’t. Because this is Dex and Nursey. They can be friends, or they can be lovers. And the second option will always end the same. 

So while Dex longs to lean up and kiss Nursey for the whole world to see, and God, is he tempted, he refrains. 

He will always choose the option that doesn’t end with Nursey hating him. 

Dex clears his throat and laughs a little, looking away, “I suspect Chowder can too. Just, you know, your friends.” 

\---

Dylan gets the message. Or he interprets some kind of message, at least, as Dex discovers one afternoon when he passes Nursey and Dex on the quad and shoots them both a thumbs up and a wink.

“What was that about?” Nursey asks, trying and failing to keep the jealousy out of his voice.

Dex shrugs, “No idea, I haven’t spoken to him in ages.”

“Oh,” Nursey attempts to fight the grin off his face. 

Dex rolls his eyes but when Nurse directs that smile at him, he fails just as hard to fight away his own grin. 

\--- 

Chris wants to say something. The longer he doesn’t, the more concerned Will becomes.

Will has been ignoring it for the past hour, focusing on his math homework, the excuse Chris had used to invite Dex over. 

It hadn’t take Will long after arriving to figure out Chris had ulterior motives. 

Will clicks the save button on his laptop, pleased with the progress he’s made, and well aware that he’s not going to be able to concentrate much longer with Chris’ eyes drilling into his head. 

“Okay, Chow,” Will spins around on the chair to face Chris, who’s starfished on his bed, “I’m all ears. Spit it out.”

Chris fidgets for a moment as if considering staying silent after all, before diving into his speech headfirst, “Right, so like, I don’t want you to get mad, which is probably not a good way to start a conversation, but it’s just you get mad when you shouldn’t sometimes, which isn’t an insult, you know, I love you, it’s just especially around Nursey...”

So it is about Nursey. Will had thought so. 

“And like I know things were weird between you for a little while, and gosh, I was terrified things were going to go back to how they were the start of freshman year, but you guys sorted yourselves out! Which makes me so proud, because it really is such an indicator of how you’ve grown as people, a couple of years ago, neither of you would have been prepared to apologise or know how to communicate with each other…” 

Will lets Chris ramble for a while but when it becomes obvious that he is nervous-stalling-for-time rambling, and not brainstorming-out-loud-to-articulate-thoughts-better rambling, Will decides enough is enough.

“Chow,” he stops him. 

Chris shoots him a guilty look before blurting out, “Why aren’t you guys dating?”

Will is taken aback. Genuinely shocked. Barrelled into by a truck he hadn’t heard coming, while standing in the middle of a paddock miles away from a road, kind of shocked. 

He’d expected a lecture. Questions about why he and Nursey had been acting weird lately. Not… that. 

“Wh.. What do you mean?” 

Chris rolls his eyes, his features set into a stubborn line now that he’s gotten the words out. “ _ I mean _ , you guys were fucking for like a month, and then you stopped, but now you’re friends again… so why have you still not sorted your shit out?”

Will blinks.

Chris blinks.

Will’s face erupts in flaming colour, “How- ?”

“Oh please!” Chris yells, “I live in the room next to you! We all share an ensuite! Neither of you are quiet! Or subtle with hickeys!” 

Will is silent for a moment before he cracks a smile, “Been wanting to get that off your chest, huh?”

Chris laughs a bit, “Oh, shut up.”

And then they’re both laughing, and Will’s chest feels light for the first time in ages. He hadn’t realised that everything with Nursey had pushed him away from Chow too. He missed being able to talk to Chris about everything. 

And then Chris levels him with that look again, “So?”

Will swallows and shrugs, trying to keep his voice steady, “We’re better as friends. Anything else never works out.” 

“Bullshit.”

“Excuse me?” 

“Bullshit. Never? Never works out? Remind me, how many times have you tried dating? Oh wait, that’s right, zero.”

Chris looks genuinely cross now and Will decides it’s best for his own safety to remain silent.

“You both started fucking without ever having a conversation about how you felt, and if Nursey hadn’t practically confirmed that for me, I would have known anyway because you both seem to forget how well I know you both!”

“What did Nursey say?” Will jumps in.

Chris levels him with a glare, “That’s not important right now. What’s important is why you think the reason your relationship failed is because the two of you are incompatible, and not because neither of you actually talked about what you wanted!”

“It was pretty obvious-”

“No, Dex,” Chris sighs, and he sounds sad now, “These things are never obvious. That’s not how relationships work. They rely on communication, on everyone involved talking about what they want, what they don’t want, how they feel at any given moment. You think me and Caitlin never have arguments? We haven’t stayed together this long because we’re perfect, Will. It’s because we talk to each other and fight to make things work.”

Will thinks about this for a moment, “You and Farmer are pretty perfect, though.”

Chris grins, “Yeah, we are. But you and Derek could be too. You just have to talk to each other.”

Will nods slowly. Everything Chris said makes perfect sense, and Will knows that his reasoning for pulling away from Nursey is irrational. He’s just afraid. 

“What exactly did Nursey tell you, Chow?” Will asks quietly.

Chris shakes his head fondly, “The two of you, I swear. All I’ll say is he seemed pretty convinced that you weren’t interested in him for anything other than sex, and he wasn’t sure you liked him all that much in general. So all those worries you have about how he feels? He’s got them too.”

Will’s not sure he believes that. Not because he thinks Chris would lie, but because he knows Chris has a much more optimistic view of the world. 

But Will has spent the past week running from his fears. Maybe he’s been running even longer than that, the past month, the past three years. 

He’s tired and out of breath.

“Okay, Chris,” Will smiles, “I’ll talk to him.” 

\---

Will lifts a fist to knock on the door and stops. 

It’s Derek’s door. It used to be their door. 

He lowers his fist. He’s not sure how to do this. 

His mind keeps flying back to when they first met. Derek Nurse, all handsome smiles and expensive clothing, intellectual words and an education from a school Will could never have dreamt of attending. 

Will had taken one look at him and thought,  _ privilege _ . 

He’d been ignorant then, unaware of the own privilege he carried in his skin. But Derek had been arrogant too, throwing his money around without a thought to how many hours Will needed to work to earn the same amount Derek carried in his wallet. 

Neither of them had listened to each other. Neither had really tried to explain how they felt, falling into the easier choice of hurling insults. 

Will smiles and lifts his fist again. They’ve both grown since then. They’re better people now. 

He knocks on the door. 

There are some shuffling noises from the room, and then the door opens and he’s standing there, curls sleep mussed on top of his head. 

Will stares for a moment before clearing his throat, “Hey Nurse, sorry it’s late, can I come in?”

Derek nods silently and opens the door wider, giving Will space to walk past. 

Now that he’s here, any words Will might have prepared evaporate from his mind. 

He twists his hands distractedly, trying to think of something, anything, to say. 

Will’s brain, in an apparent effort to sabotage his plans, decides on, “I heard Angela’s got a girlfriend now.”

The room is silent for a moment before Will groans and brings his hands to his face, “That’s not what I meant to say.”

Will’s screw up apparently imbues Derek with confidence, as he starts laughing and goes to sit down at the desk. 

“What did you mean to say, Dex?” He sounds amused, and his lack of annoyance gives Will just enough hope to keep talking. 

He supposes Angela is as good a starting point as any, “I should’ve asked what was going on with her. How you felt. Before I yelled at you about it, I mean. And I should have believed you when you told me nothing was happening. Right away. I did believe you later, though. After I left and calmed down and thought about it. I believed you. Before I found out about her girlfriend. I was just too upset and ashamed to say anything.”

Will takes a deep breath, “You should know that I didn’t think you were sleeping with her because you’re bisexual, though. Or, if that was part of the reason, then it was unconscious bias or whatever Shitty called it. I don’t think you’re naturally a cheater or something like that. It’s just… there weren’t many gay guys where I grew up. Ones I knew about, anyway. There was kind of an unspoken agreement not to talk about who you were hooking up with, and no one did proper relationships. So, It wasn’t really about you at all. I wanted you to know that.” 

Derek gives him a genuine smile, “Thanks, Dex. I appreciate that.”

Will nods and they stand in silence for a second before Derek clears his throat, “I’m sorry about Dylan too. For, um, calling him ‘kegster asshole’ and everything. You had every right to kiss him at the kegster, and text him and hang out with him afterwards. I shouldn’t have had a go at you about it. And for accusing you of having something going on with him, but also we hadn’t established that what we had going on was exclusive, so I’m sorry for being a jealous asshole about it.”

Will lets out a snort at that, “Thanks Nurse, but I’m pretty sure if anyone deserves the title of ‘jealous asshole’ it’s me.” 

They chuckle at that for a moment before Will awkwardly continues, “Uh, also we weren’t doing anything, apart from that kiss, we went like out for coffee but it was pretty bad. He did, um, text me the other day but I… uh, ignored him.” 

Derek stares at him for a moment before it clicks, “Look at you, William J. Poindexter, out here getting booty calls!”

Will gives him a flat, unimpressed look.

Derek laughs and offers him another smile, “Thanks for coming to talk to me, Dex. I was afraid we were just gonna pretend nothing ever happened.” 

Will coughs awkwardly and scratches his neck, “Yeah, well. Chowder yelled at me about getting my shit together. So.”

Derek nods slowly, “Right. Okay.”

Will can feel the tension building up around them and desperately wishes it would go away. He just wants to talk. To tell Derek how he feels.  _ Derek _ . He’s not sure he’s ever called him by his first name before. 

He tries it out, “Derek.”

Will likes how it sounds. Derek looks shocked, then pleased. 

Will  _ definitely _ likes how it sounds. 

“Derek,” he says again just because he can, “I don’t want to pretend nothing happened between us. I don’t want to forget about it, either. But I also don’t want to do it again.”

“Okay,” Derek says quietly, and Will can see him building up his walls again, and that’s the last thing he wants. 

He hesitates, trying to find the right words to say what he means, but he can’t, he’s not the poet here, and Derek’s just standing there with his face growing more impassive by the second, and Will blurts out, “Stop that, you idiot, I love you.” 

Derek’s mask shatters faster than Will’s ever seen it break, his face flooding with emotion. Will doesn’t spend too long analysing which emotion though, overcome with panic at his sudden confession. His mouth apparently decides the best solution to this is to continue talking, so without any input from his brain, he starts rambling in a feat that would impress even Chowder. 

“I hate it when you try to control how you’re perceived, Nurse, because you’re really shit at it and I can see right through you. Why do you believe you can hide your emotions when you’re at best, intermediately versed in your own feelings? You literally complain about not knowing how to describe your emotions every time you write! So why do you think you can fool everyone else? You’re shit at acting ‘chill’! You’re always so stressed!”

Will knows that he’s just told Derek he loves him and now he’s standing here insulting him, and he can see the irony in that, but he’s also equally aware that he’s subconsciously giving Derek an excuse to reject him. Because his brain thinks that would hurt less somehow. He can practically see the school psych rolling his eyes, not that he ever actually has.

He takes a deep breath and continues rambling, but tries to steer it back on track, “So when I said I didn’t want to go back to doing what we were doing before, I meant because I want to actually date you and shit, not that I wasn’t like, interested in you. Or whatever. Asshole.”

The room is silent for a minute while they both process everything that just came out of Will’s mouth. 

Finally, Derek sidles up to Will and swings his arms around his neck, “I’m the asshole, huh? Don’t think I was the one ranting just a minute ago.”

But he’s grinning, so Will ignores the flush on his cheeks at having Derek so close, and mutters, “Shut up.”

“And I've just got one more thing to say; if we’re talking about being ‘intermediately versed in feelings’, I gotta say, that’s a tad hypocritical coming from -”

“Oh, shut up, Nursey,” Will groans into Derek’s mouth.

Will can feel Derek’s smile against his lips before he tilts his head and starts kissing him back. 

It reminds Will of their first kiss. The two of them standing in this room. One of them shutting the other up in the only way that’s ever worked for them. 

But this kiss is so different from that kiss, too. So different from all of their kisses.

It’s softer, because neither of them feels like arguing any more. It’s kinder, because they’ve forgiven each other and themselves. 

And it’s slower. Because they both know they have all the time in the world. 

“Nursey,” Will murmurs into his mouth. 

“You called me Derek before.”

Will pulls away and smiles, “Derek.”

Derek smiles, “William.”

Will scrunches up his nose.

Derek laughs, “Will?.”

“Much better.”

“William, will you do me the honour of becoming my boyfriend?”

Will rolls his eyes but he’s grinning, “Yeah, alright.”

“There’s something you should know first, though.”

“Oh?”

“Yeah, there’s this guy I’m in love with.”

Will can hear the laughter in Derek’s tone, but he narrows his eyes jokingly anyway, “Go on.”

“Yeah. Complete dumbass. Ginger hair, freckles everywhere. Can pick a fight about anything if he's in the right mood.”

“Oh, fuck off,” Will pushes Derek in the chest, laughing, before he’s pulled in for another kiss.

\--- 

“You really think this is gonna work out?”

They’re lying on the bottom bunk in their room, Will’s stuff newly returned to the space around them. Derek is running his fingers idly through Will’s hair, while Will’s brain is not so idly digging up all of his insecurities. 

Derek hums, letting Will knows he’s listening and encouraging him to keep talking. 

“It’s just, sometimes I think this will always end with us hating each other Nurse, and maybe we’re just destined to fail. We didn’t exactly start out great. ”

Derek moves so they’re both sitting up, looks Will in the eyes, and shakes his head resolutely, “I know for a fact that that’s wrong.”

“How?”

Derek’s face lights up in Will’s favourite smile of his, the one that softens his features and makes his eyes glow with warmth. The one that shows Will everything he’s thinking, because he trusts Will with it, trusts him enough to let down his guard and take off his mask. 

“Because I’ve never hated you, Poindexter.”

Will looks at him, and he knows it’s true. 

“I love you too, Nurse.” 

**Author's Note:**

> I promised a happier sequel, didn't I? Admittedly, I still threw in a lot of angst, but hey, we got there in the end. 
> 
> Might write another piece in this series about our fave boys coming out to the team if anyone's interested. (Oh wait, I'm interested!)


End file.
